Loss

I am struggling to get on with my days at times as of late. I am working on praying and being more open with God as well as my husband. I can have a tendency to bottle things and then they come out all wrong.

Tomorrow my doctor is leaving. This already had me sad but changes in life are inevitable. I guess I just don’t always handle it well. I think I lack trust in God at times. I get comfy with how things are then something happens and it completely throws me off.

So my doctor is leaving which I have known for awhile. He was a blessing but God is calling him elsewhere and we have to follow the call.

Another call came for Princess a cat that has been in my family for a very long time. Just this past Sunday, he was called home to be with Jesus. I don’t want to debate cats being in Heaven. My heart cannot take it. I hope they are there, I pray maybe they are but if not, Heaven will be so joyful I will not even think on it. But right now, I hold onto hope.

So 2 losses in one week. I hate loss, I really do. I have lost so much in this life, apartments full of furniture, my innocence so young, people, places, but for some reason animals get me the most at times.

I love animals and believe it or not, despite my skills for being able to talk a lot once I know you, I am pretty introverted. I talked a lot to cats and no, they did not reply lol just in kitty ways. But I leaned a lot on animals and took good care of them for Jesus. I still take this seriously. Is it a calling? Well sometimes I do wonder but I also know I have PTSD and so maybe that is part of why the animals are a big part of my life.

I think it is important we take good care of God’s creation, whatever part of it we do. Everything is the Lord’s, even the clothes on our backs. He lets us use them. The pets we may have right now, He lets us care for them. It is truly an honor.

So I guess with all of this being said, and forgive me for it being jumbled. My heart is still aching quite a bit emotionally, loss on earth is going to happen but we have Heaven to look forward to. And nothing is too great for the Lord to heal.

So may the Lord bless and guide my doctor as he ventures out on a new journey. May the Lord comfort all of those struggling with change and help us to trust in His will for our lives. May we cling to the cross whatever comes our way. And yes, I truly do hope now that Smokey, Snowball, Pikachu, and Princess are all together or will be in Heaven. I will never forget them.

Time for new seasons of life. Lord, Your will, not mine, be done.

In Jesus Name Amen

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